Title: Not My Reality
Rating: NC-17 for later chapters
Summary: Buffy is a single, twenty-six year old assistant manager at Bloomingdale's department store. Buffy and her best friend, Willow, love to watch reality TV shows. When Angel is the runner up on the Bachelorette show and then becomes the next Bachelor, Willow sends in Buffy's photo and details to the casting team. What's a girl to do when she goes on a reality TV show to get to know a man she'd been attracted to only to fall for one of the camera guys instead?
Betas: mabel_marsters & xtanitx.
a/n: Well, I never thought I'd write an All Human Spuffy story, but I did. Now that I'm posting this final chapter, I'm feeling sad about it ending. I had so much fun playing with the characters out of canon. I hope you all had fun right along with me. Thanks for reading!
Previous Chapters Here
Not My Reality
Buffy pulled Spike along the little path up to Willow and Oz’s house. He’d been dragging his feet all day, but she didn’t want to miss any of the finale.
“You guys are late,” Willow said as she opened the door wide. “The episode is about to start.”
Oz handed Spike a beer before they could even sit down and offered Buffy water or soda. Willow had gone all out, with a full spread of snacks laid out before the three couples.
“You would think it was the Super Bowl or something,” Oz said with a roll of his eyes.
“We’ve been waiting all week for this,” Jesse said.
“Too bad Faith couldn’t call you and tell you if she was with Angel or not,” Xander said before taking a sip of his beer.
“I know, but we all signed those confidentiality agreements and we were sworn to secrecy until after the episodes air.” Buffy popped a Cheeto in her mouth, chewed and swallow as the theme music for The Bachelor began from the big screen TV. “Besides, this is really exciting.”
“Just think,” Xander said, “If you hadn’t met Spike, you might have gone this far.”
When she got a look at the perturbed face of her fiancé, she tried not to laugh. Spike had said that out of all her friends, Xander annoyed him the most.
“I don’t think so, Xand. Meeting Spike or not, Angel was not right for me. And I’m so glad Spike and I met.”
Spike grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze, but everyone stayed quiet as the host of the show narrated a recap of the season while scenes from previous episodes played on the screen. Buffy couldn’t help but duck her head and not look when her scenes were played, though her friends cheered for her. She snuggled closer to Spike on the couch and settled in for the show.
First up was Cordelia. Angel started the date off by taking her to a local pub in his family’s hometown. He explained to Cordelia that while he was born in America and had been raised there, his family had decided to move back to their native Ireland a few years ago and that he loved to come and visit them on his vacations.
Once they arrived at his parent’s house, things got interesting. Buffy was doubly glad that she hadn’t gotten that far when she got her first look at Angel’s dad. He was all business-like and glared down at Cordelia, who tried her best to charm the surly man. Angel’s mother was a lot friendlier and got along with Cordelia quite nicely. It was Angel’s teenage sister who gave Cordelia the most trouble. She made snide comments and rolled her eyes at Cordelia’s behavior. Buffy thought she might like Angel’s sister. At least she could see right through the act.
Buffy sat up straighter when, after a commercial, Angel and Faith met at the same pub. If Faith could just relax and be herself, Buffy was sure that Angel would choose her. The couple talked over pints of ale and then they headed over to his family’s home. Angel’s father was just as surly with Faith, but she shook his hand firmly and soon had the man relaxing as they discussed the private eye business. His mom was nice to Faith, but she didn’t seem as enthusiastic as she had been with Cordelia. This worried Buffy and she said so to the others in the room with her.
She glanced around and grinned when she noticed how into the episode Oz and Spike were, even though they both had moaned and groaned about having to waste their time watching it.
Faith finally got a chance to talk with Angel’s sister and the two of them hit it off right away, causing Buffy to relax a little more. Still Buffy could not tell whom Angel would pick.
The two woman each had one last romantic date with Angel, and Buffy willed Faith to tell Angel that she was in love with him. Faith was not the type to get all gushy and Buffy just knew that Cordelia would say she was in love with him whether she was or not, just because she wanted to win so badly. Faith had to step up her game and lay it all on the line.
Buffy jumped out of her seat and gave a victory shout when Faith finally told him how she felt. Of course, after the final dates, Angel had to say that he was having a tough time and did not know yet which woman he would propose to. They went to a commercial and both Willow and Buffy got up to replace the dwindling snacks. As they busied themselves in the kitchen, they giggled when they heard the four guys discussing and predicting an outcome.
“So, you really want Faith to win, then?” Willow asked.
“Oh, definitely. Cordelia was even worse to live with than how she comes across on TV and Faith genuinely has a thing for Angel. I think they could be happy together.”
“Hurry up, girls. It’s back on,” Spike yelled from the living room.
They rushed over and sat down just in time to see Faith step out of the limo. Buffy’s heart sank. If she was first to meet Angel, then it meant she probably was going to get dumped. Faith didn’t know which order she was meeting up with Angel. She looked terribly nervous but beautiful in an off-white evening gown that enhanced her curves. Faith said goodbye to Chris and took the long walk in her high heels to the fountain where Angel was waiting for her.
Buffy grabbed Spike’s hand and he squeezed back.
Angel held his hands out to Faith and gave her a big hug. “Hi there, darling.”
“Hi,” Faith said, smiling cautiously at Angel. “Tell me now if I’m not getting a rose, because I don’t think I can take much more of this.”
“From the moment you stepped out of that limo in your slacks and walked up to me with all that attitude, I have been intrigued by you. The longer I get to know you, the more I find to like. And every date that we’ve spent together has been near perfect.”
Buffy and Jesse both squealed when Angel pulled out a velvet box and got on his knees.
“I can’t believe it!” Willow said. “I thought for sure she was a goner because she was up first!”
As soon as Angel declared his love for Faith and asked her to marry him, Buffy pulled out her cell phone and dialed Faith’s number. Faith said yes on the television screen just as she answered her cell phone.
“Hey, B, how’s it going?” Faith said, laughing into the phone. “I knew you would call.”
“Are you still engaged!” Buffy asked.
The show went to a commercial and all her friends stared at Buffy as she talked on the phone.
“Yes, we are. But it’s going to be a long engagement.”
Buffy nodded so everyone in the room would know the answer to her question and Faith continued by saying, “I’m already in L.A. and I’m moving into the Hyperion right now.”
Faith seemed so happy as she laughed into the phone. “Yes. I couldn’t move in until the episode aired and Angel wanted me here as soon as possible. Oh, and Lorne is throwing a party tomorrow night at Caritas and you, Spike and your friends are invited.”
“Cool. I’ll tell the others, but I know that Spike and I have nothing planned. We can make it for sure.” Buffy smiled at Spike who frowned at her, but she knew he’d enjoy himself once he got there. The show came back from a commercial and Buffy watched absently as she talked to Faith. “Poor Cordelia. She looks so confident getting out of the limo. Are you watching right now too?”
“Yes, but Angel already told me what happened when he told Cordelia that she wasn’t getting a rose. You don’t want to miss it, so I’ll let you go. I’ll see you tomorrow at eight?”
“We’ll be there,” Buffy said before she hung up.
Buffy couldn’t help but feel bad for Cordelia as she was let down gently. Her face fell in obvious surprise, but then she glared at Angel while he apologized. Cordelia didn’t say a word. She turned her back on him and stormed away. Angel chased her down and opened the limo for her. He tried to talk to her, but she put her hand up and said, “Don’t.”
“I don’t envy Andrew and the job he had of being in that limo with a brassed off Cordelia after that,” Spike said with a chuckle.
As she was driven away, Cordelia showed some of her true colors and was as caustic and mean as Buffy remembered her being during their stay at the Bachelor House. Oz switched off the TV and the room was quiet for a few seconds.
“Damn!” Jesse broke the silence. “That woman was a real beyotch.”
After Buffy was able to control her giggles, she let the others know that they were all invited to Angel and Faith’s party at Caritas.
~ * ~ * ~
Caritas was already jumping by the time Buffy and Spike arrived with the rest of group right behind them. Faith spotted them and ran over to give Buffy a hug.
“Thank you so much for all your support. I don’t think I would be where I am now if you hadn’t been there for me.”
Buffy blushed, but didn’t have time to say anything, because Faith grabbed her hand and they compared rings. Angel walked up and Faith rolled her eyes at the halfhearted greeting Spike and Angel gave each other.
“Let’s leave those two to glare at each other and show the rest of these guys how to really dance,” Faith said, grabbing Willow’s hand as well and pulling them both along.
Buffy was having the time of her life. Faith pointed out Fred to her after they stopped dancing, but she had yet to go say hello. The pretty scientist was sitting in a quiet corner in deep conversation with Angel’s fellow P.I., Wesley. While Buffy’s friends played darts across the room, Faith and Angel sat opposite Spike and Buffy at one of the tables.
“So, have you guys picked out a date for the wedding?” Angel asked.
“Not yet, but sometime before the end of the year. Right, pet?” Spike said.
Buffy nodded and said, “What about you two?”
“The show wanted us to do a special and get married this week, live on television,” Faith said. “Like that was going to happen.”
Angel set his beer down and said, “We were thinking a long engagement would be good. One or two years.”
“That’s the smart way to do it,” Spike said.
“Well, don’t be surprised if they call you guys, asking you to get married for a special,” Angel said.
Spike and Buffy both laughed, but Buffy was the one to say, “They already did ask us to get married during the “After the Rose” special next week, but getting engaged in front of an audience is all the excitement I can take. No public wedding for me.”
Faith’s face lit up. “You guys are coming on the special, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” Spike said, but grumbled under his breath about having to be in front of a camera again.
“Oh, good. Maybe they’ll have us all out there at the same time.” Faith smiled at Buffy. “I can’t wait to tell everyone how you stuck around and helped me out.”
Buffy shook her head. “I don’t know if I can take much more of the media frenzy over all this. Spike and I get calls all the time, wanting us to appear on morning shows and late night shows.”
Angel kissed the back of Faith’s hand and said, “We just came from taping the Tonight Show that will air in a few hours.”
After comparing notes on what the media wanted the two couples to do, Angel asked Faith to dance. Spike took Buffy’s hand and led her out into the hotel lobby. They said hi to Eve who was manning the front desk and then Spike pushed the button for the elevator.
“What are you doing?” Buffy asked.
“It’s the only place I can think of where I can get you alone for a few minutes.”
The chime rang and the doors split open. They stepped inside and as soon as the doors closed, Spike put his arms around her, kissing her while he maneuvered them into a corner.
“I’ve been wanting to get you alone like this all night,” Spike said as he nuzzled her neck.
“Hmm, I’m not complaining.” She smiled at him and kissed his nose. “I don’t think you know this, but the first time I saw you was in an elevator at the ABC studios.”
“Really? How come I don’t remember seeing you?”
“Probably because you were too busy complaining to Carlos about having to do The Bachelor job.”
Spike chuckled. “I do remember complaining about it. I can’t believe that I didn’t notice you then.”
“Well, once I heard you describing bachelorettes as bimbos, I sort of hid behind Willow.”
“After meeting you, my opinion has drastically changed. Not all the bachelorettes were bimbos.”
Buffy sighed and said, “And after living with a bunch of bachelorettes, I have to say some of them are bimbos.”
With his hand against the elevator wall, Spike leaned in close to Buffy and arched a brow at her. “So, do you wanna make out in this elevator, or what?”
As she leaned in and raised herself up to kiss him, Buffy thought about how lucky she was to have Spike in her life. He was gorgeous, sexy, fun, and exciting, and he was all hers. They were so in to each other that they didn’t notice when the doors opened again at lobby level until Faith cleared her throat.
“Damn, you guys should get a room.”
Buffy and Spike pulled apart slowly, gazing at each other. Without looking away from her fiancé, Buffy asked, “Why aren’t you still celebrating in the club?”
“’Cause I came looking for you. We just found out who the Bachelorette for next season is going to be and you’ll never guess who it is.” Faith could barely keep a straight face.
At the same time, Buffy and Spike stepped out of the elevator and asked, “Who?”
“Harmony,” Faith said, bursting into laughter.
Spike groaned. “Bugger that! There’s no way I’m doing that job.” He shook his head. “I swear, if they assign me to a camera on that show, I’ll quit.” Buffy and Faith continued to laugh as they all walked back to the club. “No really. I’d rather clean toilets at the county jail than work that show.”
Buffy let Faith go in before them and stopped Spike. “I wouldn’t want you to take that job either, because I know that Harmony had the hots for you.”
“You have no reason to be jealous,” Spike said, pulling her into a hug. “Seriously, that girl is exactly my definition of a bimbo. Besides, there will never been another woman for me but you, Buffy. You are it.”
The way he stared at her sometimes was as if he worshipped her, and Buffy basked in his love. She’d never been loved as completely as the way Spike loved her before. She threaded her fingers through the hair at the back of Spike’s neck and said, “Reality is so much better than TV. I love you so much.”
“I love you too, pet.”
The door to the club opened, letting out the loud music. Faith grabbed them both by an arm and pulled them in. “Will you two stop making with all that gushy stuff?”
Spike grabbed Buffy and planted a big kiss on her lips before saying, “Never!”